...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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