Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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