i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
How's work?
Spinning.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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