I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
