hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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