"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
