Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
