I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
