i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Operation Purity has been aborted
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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