office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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