so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
