i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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