I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We talked him into tasing himself.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
