hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
