Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
