my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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