I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
