its not stalking. its research.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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