have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
