Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
