uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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