i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
