I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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