Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
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