So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm way too hungover for life right now
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
