So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
