just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
