Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
