Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm getting married
To pizza
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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