do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
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