There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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