Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
