what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
