Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
