Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
