we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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