I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
