I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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