Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
