No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
