New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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