It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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