I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
