Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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