I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Randomize
