You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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