All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize