you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
