Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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