my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
