it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
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