Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
